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A large sculpture depicting a woman with her finger to her lips in a "shushing" pose was recently unveiled in Jersey City, New Jersey. The statue is called "Water's Soul" and it is intended as a tribute to the beauty and importance of the Hudson River. The artist placed his art so that it would overlook the river and face New York City in the hope that it would unite the people of Jersey City and New York City. Unfortunately, the powers that be in Jersey City decided that the statue needed some modifications. "Ya know, having a lady shushing, or whatever, is nice I guess, but it just don't feel like New Jersey," said Jersey City council member Art Gottago. "I mean, maybe some fancy-schmancy states like Connecticut would say it's great, but this is Jersey! I'm not saying the statue is bad or nothin', but c'mon! It's a giant lady asking people to be quiet. Good luck with that!" The Jersey City Council determined that the

Former President Donald Trump announced that based on a unique interpretation of the Constitution, he actually won the election by receiving fewer votes. Trump is suggesting that a little known amendment states that in the event of suspected voter fraud, the candidate who receives fewer votes is obviously not the cheater and, therefore, will be declared the winner. "Of course, I won the election," said Trump. "Every poll shows I should have won and if the election hadn't been stolen, I would still be in the White House. But I've had some of the best people looking into it, and they've come up with a great, really, really great answer that will stop the steal." The best people that Trump is referring to is CEO of the My Pillow company, Mike Lindell. He claims that while doing research in the National Archives, he discovered an unknown part of the 12th Amendment. "Don't let the fake news media fool you," said Lindell. "Donald Trump won t

In an effort to help debunk the myth that vaccinations are necessary, Representative Marjorie Taylor Green has created a friendly mascot to spread awareness. "The American people need to remember that this is not Nazi Germany!" said Greene, invoking her favorite historical analogy. "No one can tell us that we have to get an untested vaccine just because there's a flu going around. Study after study has shown that the vaccine is not effective, no matter what the leftist media preaches. That's why I have created Auntie Vaxxer as an anti-vaccination mascot." Greene explained that Auntie Vaxxer is a sweet little old lady who represents the best in American values. She is full of old-time wisdom and common sense. "We will bring Auntie Vaxxer to various social media and produce pamphlets where Auntie Vaxxer will explain in simple words why no one can make you get vaccinated." Rep Greene says Auntie Vaxxer may be cute, but she has an important job. "

President Joe Biden has decided that the state of Florida is no longer worth the trouble. "Sometimes you realize you just have to cut bait," said the president. "I just didn't know what we could do about it. Then, last Sunday, I was watching cartoons with my grandson. A Bugs Bunny comes on and at some point Bugs takes a big saw and cuts Florida loose. That's when it hits me; maybe we can't cut Florida off the continent, but I bet we could get some other country to take it off our hands." There is precedent for countries to buy and sell territories. Although his offer was not accepted, former president President Trump tried to buy Greenland from Denmark. The United States purchased the entire middle of the country from France with the Louisiana Purchase. In 1867, Russia sold Alaska to the U.S. for $7.2 million. So the idea of selling Florida to another nation is not all that strange. The Biden administration is actively seeking buyers. They have already r