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A large sculpture depicting a woman with her finger to her lips in a "shushing" pose was recently unveiled in Jersey City, New Jersey. The statue is called "Water's Soul" and it is intended as a tribute to the beauty and importance of the Hudson River. The artist placed his art so that it would overlook the river and face New York City in the hope that it would unite the people of Jersey City and New York City. Unfortunately, the powers that be in Jersey City decided that the statue needed some modifications. "Ya know, having a lady shushing, or whatever, is nice I guess, but it just don't feel like New Jersey," said Jersey City council member Art Gottago. "I mean, maybe some fancy-schmancy states like Connecticut would say it's great, but this is Jersey! I'm not saying the statue is bad or nothin', but c'mon! It's a giant lady asking people to be quiet. Good luck with that!" The Jersey City Council determined that the

Former President Donald Trump announced that based on a unique interpretation of the Constitution, he actually won the election by receiving fewer votes. Trump is suggesting that a little known amendment states that in the event of suspected voter fraud, the candidate who receives fewer votes is obviously not the cheater and, therefore, will be declared the winner. "Of course, I won the election," said Trump. "Every poll shows I should have won and if the election hadn't been stolen, I would still be in the White House. But I've had some of the best people looking into it, and they've come up with a great, really, really great answer that will stop the steal." The best people that Trump is referring to is CEO of the My Pillow company, Mike Lindell. He claims that while doing research in the National Archives, he discovered an unknown part of the 12th Amendment. "Don't let the fake news media fool you," said Lindell. "Donald Trump won t